Staying alive

I was of the opinion that individual responsibility is the highest of all ideals. I believed this because I had assumed this to be the strongest and most potent force of change in the world. If you want to save the world, save yourself, and all that. It was natural to assume this was the most useful thing to focus on to me. Everything else seemed so complicated and out of control. It all seemed so beyond the domian of human control. An online discussion around Parasite was the first thing that challenged this notion for me.

I realised that everyone minding their own business and doing their best won't necessarily fix everything. Some external factors will always continue to keep people stuck in bad places. Many of these things were systemic. At that time I just became open to the inherent problems of capitalism and the systems that are tied to it. I realised that they are too far from perfect to just be left to dealt with by people's good hearted nature. You need more than love to change the real world.

Today I realised that economic problems are at the root of so many things that are wrong with people. I realised that it is more fruitful to try to adapt the system rather than tryng to adapt yourself to it. I do not expect this to be an achievable goal, but I know that it is the great problem we currently face. Perhaps it is a good idea to stop doing the damage if you can afford it at least.

While these enormous problems do not serve as an excuse to for personal development, those who enjoy the luxury of striving to become better should at the very least feel responcible toward their position to deal with these things. I do not imagine I could contemplate and come up with a solution to the follies of capitalism, but I hope to become aware of my own contribution to the problem and engage in the conversation around the issues. That starts with me acknowledging thier existence. Thus I strive to keep my mind open and learn more about the potential roots of these issues, and try to imagine a different alternative.

I shall not forgo my own efforts to fit within the system either, because ultimately I have no real choice, but I hope that my experiences may lead to a better understanding of this complex issue. I had earlier today gotten angry at the trans community for attempting to boycott Hogward Legacy. I thought it was an absurd way to go about creating positive change. Upon a basic research I realised though that these people are actually marginalized and are in fact probably face real violence and animosity all too commonly. Whether or not I truly understand their struggles and their mission, whether or not I understand the legitimacy of their life conditions, there is one thing I can empathise with.

Everyone is trying their best to create a better world in their own way. For themselves, their futures, and those that may come after them. The issues that we are all dealing with are big, scary, complicated, and intimidating. If nothing else I can appreciate other people's courage, tenasity, and will to make efforts toward reaching a better place.